We have an incredible show for our 21^st show.  Believe it or not we were able to book an internet superstar.  The one and only PM.  Yes thats short for Phallic Master.  This is the Master of Penis, the Sultan of Schlong, the Encyclopedia Phallatica.  He is the owner of www.penissizelinks.com  and is one of the few people on this planet that has all the definitive answers about the male member. This is one of the most amazing sites.  Its totally free and you can learn anything you want to know about your dong.  We have questions for Phallic Master that all our listeners have been dying to ask but were too scared to.  Find out what motivated this man to create this site.  Does his friends and family know about it?  What is his day job?

Find out the answers to important questions such as...
Do women care about penis size? What is the average size of a penis? Do black guys really have huge dongs?  Do women prefer circumcised guys?  Who are some celebrities with big dicks.  What are some ways to increase penis size and do any of these methods work? What are some ways to make your penis looks bigger?  Find out all the answers to these burning questions and more. If you want to continue this saga check out Phallic Master by clicking on the link www.penissizelinks.com

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The show starts off with a very drunk H-dizzle snapping the huge studio headphones onto his nose by mistake and almost breaking it.  Unbelieveable.  We have listeners!!!  Its been a long time coming but we have been getting mad emails.  Homi reads off some of the emails that have been coming in.  Derek has sent us an email.  He thinks we do better on our show than many famous people who do this for a living.  He wants to know our favorite sex positions.  H-dizzle says his favorite position is 69 by far.  He loves getting his dick sucked while he eats a girl out.  JC is not a big fan but agrees that eating a girl out can bring a girl back for more.  JC starts to talk about ATM which is an acronym for ass to mouth.  Another position that JC heard about is the Helicopter.  The girl does a 360 on a guys dick. WOW! Gotta try that one out.  We get a trick from Derek who likes to get his women drunk before picking them up at a club....including 170 pound women.  Wow Derek, you go boy!  Lets hope that woman was 6'9.

Next up...the halloween party.  H-Dizzle feels that all the women are after him so he invites JC to the party.  JC thinks that H-Dizzle is all full of shit.  H-Dizzle disagrees and proves it to JC. Lara Croft Tomb Raider is after him and yes he is hot. Hear all the details of the party and all the different women that showed up.  Hear about the hot mexican, the crusty feet Guatamalean, the redhead. 

JC takes a visit to his Cousins to meet the 8 Kats.  The 8 Kats talked a big game months before to get JC to come down to visit.  When he gets there.  NOTHING.  They pussed out like little bitches.  They stayed home with their girlfriends instead of going out to party.  LFB was in full action.  The Little Fat Buddy was by JC's side to protect him from fat chicks.  He was the only Kat that stayed by his side.  Hoes were abound.  But the Kats were clowns.  Hear all about JC's visit and how he met a bunch of fat girls and their lesbian friends. 

H-Dizzle was almost on Howard Stern.  He was in the middle of a phone call about to plug the shows website when Howard Stern didnt like his phone connection and hung up on him.  But H-Dizzle did make a new song called Dreams.  As the song ends H-Dizzle starts to talk about his dreams when JC rudely interrupts him with the latest issue of stuff magazine.  Autumn Reeser from the OC is on the cover.  This leads to a conversation about Mischa Barton and how ugly she is.  JC points out how the blurbs and captions are misleading.  This particular article says Autumn Reeser loves older men but when read the actual article she says she likes young guys.  And now a word from our sponsor.  Tequila!

And now for our website exclusive.  The Insane Tatoo!!  You are not going to believe this video.  A man gets extreme tattooed which involves getting your skin cut up with a scapel and then the chunks of skin and flesh removed and ink rubbed in.  Watch an entire guys back get butchered. He doesnt even flinch.  Watch the video here. http://youtube.com/watch?v=xNoniNKhwFg

H-Dizzle goes to a Lock and Key Party.  Hear about the details as he dwelves into a party full of desperate women.  Did he get laid? Did his friend get laid?  A fight almost breaks out between H-dizzle and one of the other guys there. 

Lastly H-dizzle runs into the girl who he used to date that said he had a little dick. This time she was with a female friend of hers. What would you do?  Avoid her or say hi?  Find out what H-dizzle did.

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Jesus is out on vacation so youre going to get a previously recorded show that youv'e never heard before.  Its a show all about Homi and this stupid bitch he used to date.  His ex girlfriend is back in his life.  Making him depressed and ruining his sleep.  His ex girlfriend is a super SUPER hot girl and now shes back in his life to ruin it.  Its been about 5 years since he has broken up with this girl and since then shes gotten her asshole and pussy torn up by some humongous cock german freak and gotten her head fucked with to where she hates men. 

Jesus cant get over how fine this girl is.  In his words "the complete package" well...almost.  The complete package minus the brains.  Jesus describes Homi when he first met him.  A loser from hell.  No one liked Homi, he was a smart aleck nerd according ot Jesus.  Thankfully Homi has grown out of that.  Homi departs some knowledge to the listeners about keeping a girl thats above the scale of looks of what you can get. Let me sum it up for you in so many words...get her pregnant!

Now here comes the horror.  After breaking up with Homi this girl dated a guy with a ginormous penis.  This penis has been rammed into her ass and cooch for about 4 1/2 years now.  Should Homi take back his ex?  HELL NO! The problem is Homi can't get this girl out his mind and its bothering him because he has a girlfriend. 

Homi tells stories about his ex girlfriend leaving him and meeting guys and then running back to him.  The latest guy is a model who lied to his ex telling her he is 24 year old turned out 4 years later she finds out he is 39 with 2 ex wives and a kid.  How can a girl is so stupid? How can such a loser get such a hot girl?  Listen to the answer.  Find out how you too can be a loser with a hot chick.

Do big dick guys ruin it for other guys?  Our hosts think so.  Once a girl has been there its no point of return. 

Up next is a song next that Homi sings about his ex girlfriend.

Lastly there is the tip of the day.  This weeks tip tells you how to pick up women in clubs.  This method entails using a scout when you first walk into a bar.  The odds of increasing play using this method is a 10 fold improvement.

Thanks for all the support and please check out our show on http://www.myspace.com/getlaidradio show and add us or you can email us at getlaidradioshow@gmail.com   

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The Craigslist Caper

We start off the show this week with our new Theme song.  What else could it be other than a girl getting fucked hard and her moaning. This brings up the discussion of Jesus's brother and what a pimp he is.  All you see is his brother bringing women in and out of his room.  They get no tour of the house no introduction nothing!  All you see is women being brought up the stairs in the dark.  The problem is his brother only lasts a couple of seconds.  Homi thinks Jesus beats off to his brother having sex because hes always in the tiny computer room next door looking at porn while his brother is having sex.

Good news.  Jesus actually made money on his Ford stock.  Homi promotes a bit of Grover from the Howard Stern show and plays his song.  Homi then has the idea of playing the moaning girl over Grover's song.  If you want to check out some of Grover's beat goto to http://www.mixtapebros.com/

In the news this week are some articles from Playboy.  There is an article about a guy breaking his dick off.  Homi has a story of where his dick almost got broken off by a girl before.  Jesus thinks Homi almost broke his dick from jacking off not sex. Another article is the women from video games in playboy.  Computer generated women that look realistic.  Homi remembers the day he used to beat off to Mario Brothers.  As the hosts are flipping through playboy they realize that the real girls look more fake then the computer generated ones.  And a good question arises.  Why are there pictures of the playmate at age 9-13.  Who are they trying to cater to?

Fan mail.  Props out to Mason from California.  He found our show by accident through Itunes.  So thanks to Mason and the Tres Jefes for the votes and email. You can check out Tres Jefes podcast at www.tresjefes.com

If you heard Howard stern recently you might have heard Homi on there.  He was recently down in New York and met up with the Howard Stern show crew and was able to make some good contacts.  He has recently gotten some of his bits played on the show.  Listen as the song is played back for your listening pleasure. Thanks Richard Christy for getting my song played.

And now the main topic of the show.  The Craigslist caper.  Homi had the bright idea of getting finding a way of getting a girl naked for 2 hours and have her enjoy her looking at her privates.  Act like he is a professional photographer making a portfolio and needs nude models. Listen to find out what happens.  Find out why Jesus doesn't want to be his assistant and why Homi thinks he is gay.  The pictures of all the possible candidates that emailed back pictures are laid out.  They are pretty hot.  Since Jesus is not down to let strange women over he passes.  He thinks that they might want to rob him.  So Homi calls up The Italian Stallion and he is way down for the deal.  Listen to The Italian Stallion's viewpoint on the issues.

For our new porn clip of the week the boys play a clip off our favorite website http://www.elephantlist.com/ and give you a running commentary.

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The Halloweenie Special

Get laid Radio show is back with a new Episode. The latest news is that JC has been decorating his Nephews room. He just got back from Wal-mart and spent 200$ on it!!! He had everything including a smoke machine and candles and a full skeleton!!! H-Dizzle thinks that WAY too much to spend on someone thats not your kid unless youre a pedophile. Turns out H-Dizzle forgot he spent 200$ on his girlfriend nephew who sounds like a little girl.

A problem arises during the show. JC's brother has a problem with H-Dizzle drinking up all his cokes in the refridgerator. This is in retaliation for his girlfriend drinking all of JC's drinks and JC saying something. H-Dizzle's argument is that beers are $1.50 and the cokes come out to .10 cents a piece. Also H-Dizzle has brought over numerous 30$ bottles of hard liquor that have been consumed by the JC household. The fight begins and the argument starts. Tune in to see who wins the fight. Should H-Dizzle have to ask before he drinks a coke?

Stocks anyone? JC thinks hes the stock king. The king of impluses is more like it. Last time he bought a 300 gallon fish tank and killed all his fish and this time he hears H-Dizzle bought stocks JC goes out and buys some google. Turns out he bought it a couple of days before report. He pays 400 for it. H-Dizzles tells him to SELL SELL SELL JC listens and sells at a loss and the next day the stock goes up to 458$. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. So what does JC do? He goes and invests whats left of his money in FORD. Which is set to report on Monday at a complete loss which shoul dop JC's life savings in half. Congrats JC on not doing your research. Kramer would be proud. Dont forget to check monday how much money JC lost.

Now to getting laid. Time to hear about cock blockers. JC's friend called with a great story about how his friend Cock blocked him. #1 rule to getting laid always make yourself look good. JC's friend was trying to make himself look great and was within minutes of getting laid when his friend blurted out and said that the guy is in the looney bin on stress leave from work. Which means he is unemployed. Game over folks. Can cock blocking be forgiven?

Get Laid Tip of the week. Be a Hero. Listen how H-dizzle is a hero and saves a kids life and promotes his heroness on myspace which has gotten him tons of women emailing him already. Jesus tries to chime in with a hero story about when he was sacking groceries. Well there is one problem with that story. You dont want women to know you were SACKING GROCERIES!!!! Women like money and power NOT 5 dollars an hour. 

Coming up next show...Our elephantlist porn clip of the week.  You can find the actual clip at www.elephantlist.com  but it will feature some hardcore fucking action and our play by play of whats going on screen.

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Lots and lots on the show this week.

http://www.elephantslist.com/ The new porn site favored by the get laid radio show.

Asian women getting fucked with sideways pussies and orgasmic screams.

Average Joe Productions.  A new porn company for average guys with small dicks.

Jesus gets laid this weekend by a recent widow.  Add that to the list of women he fucks. 1. Married women 2. women with boyfriends 3. recent widows!  What new low will he sink to next? Listen as Jesus describes all the positions he does with her that he learnt from elephants list.

H-dogg has a new hobby he has been using to get laid. Photoraphy.  Learn how to use it to photograph naked women and have them pay you.

Learn the cell phone method used by H-dogg when you have sex in your car.

H-dogg has a trip to New York and meets everyone from the show.  Howard Stern, Robin Quivers, Baba Booey (gary dell'a'bate), richard christ, sal the stock broker, shuli, penny crone, tim sabean, and scott the engineer. He also ran into Mary Carey.

Finally H-dogg talks about all the pussy available in New York and the methods he used to meet women in Central Park.  Also using Salsa dancing to get pussy.

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What a start to a bad ass show.  Jesus isnt there for the start of the show because hes taking a huge shit so Homi has to start the show on his own.  The show starts off with Homi discussing Jesus vacation...if you can even call it that.  Jesus sat at home all day and just got drunk for a entire week off. 

 Jesus wants to clown on Homi for having a girlfriend but Homi isnt down for it.  He fights back and tells Jesus that he looks in the wrong places for women and he only dating married women, women with boyfriends and women 1/10 his age.  Homi cant take it knowing that he might one day settle down and be with a girl for the rest of his life. 

Homis girlfriend is getting calls from her ex boyfriend who is some millionaire who invented Vidal Sassoon or some shit. Remember Sully from the last show?  Well she just wont give up on trying to get a date with Jaquin the model.  Homi breaks down the deal to Jesus on why its a ridiculous dream. Bottom line.  He is hot and she is not!

Homi goes to his girlfriends friends Quinceanera.  This is his chance to meet the family of his girlfriend and find out what his girlfriends going to look like when shes older.  Find out what happened.  The good thing is a quinceanera is full of hot chicks for Homi to look at. Homis girlfriends family was curious about Homi and thought he was a curiosity and wanted to know things such as does he wear rings around his neck to stretch it out and if he knows what the differences between turbans are.

Homi bought some new clothes from Express to wear to the quinceanera turns out the pants were too tight so Homi went in after wearing them to exchange them for a larger pair.  Jesus had a problem with Homi returning some pants he farted in and dropped salsa on and smelled like curry and he might have to buy it later on.  Hear as Homi calls an Express store so Jesus can ask them if its the right thing to do.

 Lots and lots more on the show.  Homi trying to buy a car for the 10,000^th time, Jesus trying to fuck a married women, and Haley Joel Osment in the news.  Come join in the fun this week its a great show!

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What a jam packed show this week.  We surprise a Major League Baseball player with a MAJOR announcement.  This player has been banging a chick at Homi's??s gym and our pro baseball player Ryan gets into it with us on the details. HOMI FINDS THE CURSING PREACHER..  Yes the Spirit of truth guy has been found and contacted and you can listen to the phone call between Homi and The Cursing Preacher.  Homi might be going on Howard Stern Show with the cursing preacher.  Stay tuned for details. Jesus is a fish murderer.  The new hobby set up for Jesus is an utter and complete disaster.  The idiot put in a couple of hundred fish in his brand new fish tank and now its nothing but dead fish.  The toll stands at 83 fish in 5 days. 

Homi has been showing too much PDA (public display of affection) to his girlfriend its getting on Jesus's nerves. Jesus has seen Homi kissing on her toes and licking her toe jam in the car and he thinks that's just nasty!!  Homi thinks that Jesus is just a jealous bitch.  Let us know what you think after you listen to the details.  Email us at jesusandhomi@gmail.com  And speaking of driving Homi STILL cant drive!!! 

Jesus heads up to San Antonio to go to some clubs and check out Six Flags over Texas.  Turns out the girls Jesus went down there with were really annoying and wanted to eat all day so they left them at the park and the women got really angry. To make matters worse the club they went to was full of fat ugly chicks.

Jesus gets conned by the perpetrator with the fake M3.  Listen how Jesus thinks he is getting the deal of a lifetime on a M3 and it turns out to be FAKE!!! BAHAHAHAHAHA.

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This weeks show starts off with Homi freestyling some rap.  This is what he has on myspace.  Turns out Homi has an unhealthy obsession with myspace that is stopping him from sleeping, eating, working, studying etc.  He is finding people from his high school that used to harass him and now he wants to prove to them that he is not the same guy.  Turns out the people he tries to make contact with still diss him.  Jesus makes an observation about how bad a driver Homi is and reveals some near death experiences he has had driving with him.  Homi talks about his new fish tank and how Jesus saw him get one and went out and impluse bought a tank 5 times the size of Homi's.  Homi watches Superman and turns out its pretty bad.  Find out the review from Homi.  Guess what.  Homi is in love.  And he actually said it to his girlfriend!! Find out her insane reaction. Homi's mom actually hates his girlfriend for bizzare racist reasons. Remember Joe from New York? Well he has a really cool way to pick up chicks.  Find out how. Its easy! you can do it too. 

Our main feature has Sully a girl who sees a picture of me with Juaquin the model from show # 7 on my myspace profile.  Now she keeps emailng me to hook me up with him.  Problem is he is a model and she is your average girl thats not really that hot.  Now Juaquin said he would consider her for a fuck buddy and to send pictures but Sully wants a relationship.  Listen as Jesus and Homi try to talk some sense into her so that she doesnt lose out on a chance to fuck a male mimbo 10.

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We got a ton of guests this show.  We got the 8 Kats in from McAllen TX.  We got the Alley Kat, Stray Kat, Kool Kat, Thunder Kat, Persian Kat, Krazy Kat and many more cats.  Listen to these REAL men discuss the how they are the OFB old fat buddy.  This guy is the lure that gets the fat girl away from the hot chicks and fucks her so that the other guys can mess with the hot ones.  We got the drunk guy that is the leaning tower of Pisa and really just mumbles. We use him to try to prank call Homi's ex girlfriend but some guy picks up and asks if its Homi.  WTF!!!  We got the Kat that loves to get blow jobs and nothing else and is the King of Porn, he discusses how he gets women from strip clubs to suck his dick on the cheap.  Some of the other kats are always farting and passing gas.  One of the kats is eating ass as his specality.  We also have the world premiere of Homi's cum s hot video and the kats confirm that he blasted off 10 shots to the dome of his girlfriend.  Thats two times the normal ejaculate.  Come in and join the drunk party and be a part of the fun and experience radio history.

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Joe visits us from New York and shares his wisdom on women.  Jesus and Homi tell us about their trip to the local comedy show to see Nick Depaulo.  Homi decides to order a bottle of champage to share with Joe which was a big mistake.  All the comics immeidately begin to single out Homi and Joe to crack jokes on.  It was a very gay display.  Find out when is the right time to call a girl after being given a phone number and what is the right way for the girl to react.  Also we have our news segmen t where we discuss the latest news on Teacher student sex as well as Dr. 90210 claiming to be a karate expert and fighting off a 80 year old man. Finally we call a black guy to try to figure out how we can get handicapped parking stickers without being handicapped like a lot of black guys.  He had some advice but we dont know if we want to take it.

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