"Everything around you was created by people no smarter than you. You can change things, influence things and build your own things people can use. Once you learn that, you'll never be the same again." - Steve This riff on the British WWII propaganda poster, Keep Calm and Carry On, slightly edges out Work Hard and Be Kind as my so-far, all-time favorite. There's plenty of places online that you can get a shirt with this design on it, but I'm particularly fond of Diesel Sweeties. The fact that proceeds benefit a local charity is just frosting on the cake. $19.50 | URL | Paypal/Credit | M: S - XL, F: S - L
"Don't fight for a king. Don't fight for his kingdoms. Don't fight for honor, don't fight for glory, don't fight for riches, because you won't get any. This is your city Stannis means to sack. That's your gate he's ramming. If he gets in it will be your house that burns. Your gold he steals, your women he rapes. Those are brave men knocking at our door. Let's go kill them!" - Tyrion Lannister Between Breaking Bad and Game of Thrones, I've been watching TV at a rate approaching when I was a teenager. ::sigh:: Peter Dinklage alone makes the whole series worth watching. And, thankfully, they gave him the Emmy already. $22 | URL | Paypal/Credit | M: S - 3XL
A cool shirt and great advice, especially since I live in a particular hurricane prone part of the country. I think planning too far in advance can be a bad idea, though. I mean, really, how does it help to plan for whether or not the universe will keep expanding? The flip side of that is someone who can't even follow their own advice. ;) $20 | URL | Paypal/Credit | M: S - 2XL
If you look at this shirt and don't think of blue sky, then you're missing out on the best work Bryan Cranston has ever put out. Yes, I know. That Bryan Cranston. Don't judge it too quickly though. Just a couple episodes in and you'll be rooting for Jesse and Walt, despite the fact that they cook crystal meth from a stripped out 1986 Fleetwood Bounder. You'll have to watch the show for awhile to get this reference though, so you'll know that anyone who grins at this shirt is a true fan. $19.99 | URL | Credit | M: S - 5XL, F: S - 2XL
It's Caturday! A whole day to celebrate the greatness that is Felis Domesticus. I should mention I'm new here. No fancy introductions, when Gregg took over the site awhile ago, I slowly started inundating his inbox with shirt's I saw & liked. He finally gave in & set me up with an account so I could post. :) It's pretty appropriate that my first post be cat related, as I spend most of my time watching cat videos online. $28.00 | Womens | Paypal Credit | F: S - L
Whether you’re a mad scientist or just screwing with your cousin because you’re bored at dinner, this shirt should ring pretty true. Let’s face it – it’s nice to be on the surviving side of Survival of the Fittest. As people, sure. But we also won’t have our lives summed up as “He’s shooting fireworks out of his butt with the angels now.” And that’s a feather in our cap. So embrace the learning. Celebrate every time you get a question right on Jeopardy. If only because it means Alex Trebek would be that much less of a jerk to you. $16.99-$17.99 | URL Mens Womens | Paypal Credit | M: S - 3XL, F: S - 2XL
Not gonna lie, this one hit a little close to home. As one skilled in the soft sciences, I see the value of aesthetic and intellectual pursuits that aren’t covered in an economics class. But if I put on my cynic’s cap for a second, I get the joke. I think people are afraid of art school because they either don’t see how it makes money, or think that it makes a pagan orgy look like Church Chat. Either way you look at it, you’ll either strike up a conversation about someone’s summer abroad studying erotic Italian sculpture or get a high-five from the person that thinks Art School is an incubator of sin. In both of these scenarios, you’re on the winning side. And that’s a pretty good way to play it. $21.99 | URL Mens | Paypal Credit | * Limited Sizes Available! M: S , XL
This is kind of like that self-help book The Secret on steroids. And I should know. I’ve been telling people I’ve read it for years just so they’d quit recommending it to me. Honestly, every time I want guidance, I just Ask the Dude. By that I mean I drink a white russian while wearing a bathrobe, and things tend to sort themselves out. Anyway, this is a fantastic message to anyone who sometimes feels like grabbing the bull by the horns, but is no stranger to those meh moments where you just plain don’t care. If you’re feeling indecisive, throw on this bad boy and let life decide for you. $19.95 | URL Mens | Paypal Credit | M: S - XXL
This shirt’s got a lot going on, and I love every second of it. Aside from its obvious correlation to three wolf moon and the bitchin’ unicycle (which may as well be called the NutRacker), this bad boy is sporting a unibrow that would makes a Frida Kahlo self-portrait look tweezed. But there’s a reason that this fella’s kicking up some wizard dust from that badass solo wheel. His heart is pure. He’s a Unicycle Shredder. It takes some unicorn-grade balls to rock a forehead caterpillar like that. And confidence like that, you just can’t knock down. On a final note – you know that unicorn totally sings The Final Countdown every time they shred the gnar. $21.99 | URL Mens Womens | Paypal Credit | M: S - XXL, F: S - L
There’s a lot to be said for simplicity. Even though the type seems as exciting as a Victorian first date, the message behind this shirt is clear: Respect. Don't be thrown by the font though. You either love the Pride and Prejudice vibe, or someone you know would respect you for it. No mystery behind this one, kids. The message is clear. Rep the respect, and respect what you rep. Sorry for the surprise gangsta rap. Felt like I needed a palate cleanser after all that Victorian business. $25.00 | URL Mens Womens Youth| Paypal Credit | Multiple shirt styles - Size availability varies between styles.
This one celebrates two of my dearest loves – Back to the Future, and Calvin & Hobbes. Both sustained me when I was a kid – although I still wonder sometimes about Doc and Marty. In this sendoff, arguably better than those pissing decals (feel free to customize one and send it to a crush. Or your boss.), Calvinized Doc and Marty let everyone know you’re still in touch with what matters. In other words – Date Bait. Enjoy. $24.00 | URL Mens | Paypal, Credit | M: S - 3XL
Hulk Hogan. Wilford Brimley. Gandhi. That handsome bastard Tom Selleck. What do they have in common? A Lip Bush that separates the boys from the men. And if there’s one way that a Mustache levels up, it’s by throwing a double-fist Shaka Bra. If there’s one way to remind someone they need to stop tripping, it’s the ultimate in Island hand gestures from America’s Jamaica – Hawaii. Home of, most notably, Dog the Bounty Hunter. Take a page out of Magnum’s book – don’t trip. $24.00 | URL Mens | Paypal Credit | M: S - L
Here’s one for all you Anglophiles out there. (I’m really hoping you read that in Casey Kasem’s voice. Sidebar – Casey Kasem’s still kicking around. I hope I sound that sultry when I’m nearly 90.) It’s Brit Skull – and it makes a perfect belated Boxing Day gift for any Harry Potter fan that’s be-bopping around your world. Now, I know that not all of us can pull off the look of these young inked bruisers, but flying the Union Jack on a skull that stretches your torso will certainly send Her Majesty a message from her cousins across the pond. And since I like you, and you probably don't like currency conversion, 20 British sterlings is about 30 of our American dollars. Not bad, Sinstar. $31.20 | URL Mens | Paypal | M: XS - XL
There’s really no two ways about it, the amish are pretty tough folk. They raise a barn like a mug, and they’ve been satirized by the king. But even more impressive is that they’ve never heard of the Kardashians. And that, I respect. In the grand tradition of Amish defiance – and because I hope to channel some of their awesome beard-growing mojo – I’m going to fight the power. Answer the call of the Mennonite Madmen, my peers. Join your Amish brethren – and Chuck D. Fight the power. $19.97 | URL Mens Womens | Paypal Credit | M: S - 2XL, F: S - 2XL
Now that the holidays are (for the most part) blissfully over, ‘tis the season to treat myself to a piece of urban flair. After all, I’ve braved the storm. I’ve wrapped up family time without having a National Lampoon meltdown. And what better way to reward myself for the sanity-bending time with the fam’ than to Deck the Abs with some boughs of badass. Mario’s back. But let’s be real, he never really left. Join me in my new tradition – MeMas. It’s kind of like XMas, but it’s for you. Treat yourself, sweetheart. You’ve earned it. But look alive, kids. This bad boy’s priced to move. It’s on sale right now, but who knows how much longer that’s going to be. So I say in the spirit of MeMas – this is gonna look bitchin. Update: They are selling out of this one fast! Only small sizes left. I'll have to look for another MeMas gift. :'( $30-$35 | URL Mens| Paypal Credit | M: XS - S
I remember when my granddad used to offer me a twenty-dollar bill. When I went to grab it, he’d yank it out of reach like that succubus from Peanuts and cry “When pigs fly!” Well, screw you old man. I’ve got my own twenty dollars now, and I spent it to toss in the face of you and your flighted-porcine doubting crowd.
It’s called heavier-than-air flight, gramps. It was probably called “witchcraft” when you were coming up, but now we just call it science.
Next time I see my granddad, I’m going to show him my shirt. And take my twenty dollars.
When Kevin Bacon was taking guff from this shitkicker, did he sit there and just take it? No. Not only did he completely destroy him in tractor chicken, he did exactly what a townie’s t-shirt told him. He danced his ass off.
My recommendation? Be like the bacon. Don’t take no guff. And let everyone know what you think. And if that doesn’t work? Start a poor man’s Oasis with your brother. I was going to include a Bacon Brothers clip here, but thought better of it. You’re all welcome.
People may not always like dealing with the police – but you can bet things would be pretty tense if you had this silverback knocking his baton on your door. Let’s celebrate freedom from our simian brothers with this cool, and kind of frightening, shirt from fiftyseven-thirtythree.
Although if there were some sort of Island of Dr. Moreau for civil servants, it might be nice for them to make DMV gorillas or meter maid gorillas. The whole poo-flinging thing may actually be an attitude improvement for them.
$30 | URL | Paypal, Credit | M: S – XXL
When E.T. phoned home the first time, he had to make do with a busted milk crate and a ten-speed. But the next time he needs a ride, he can just phone Dial-A-Butler and catch a ride on a sassy old-style big wheel. In round two, he’s going to get serious about the image he projects on the moon.
Because this time around, E.T.’s not going out like some punk. He’s going out in style. He’s going to let all those G-men on his case know which end is up. That’s right, coppers – straight from E.T. to you.
$24 | URL | Paypal, Credit | M: S – 3XL
I’m pretty into bowling. It’s one of the only sports you can play between bites of chicken wings – which means it should be in the Olympics. But until the International Olympic Committee hears the call of the people, I’ll lobby for the game of kings with the Bowling is for Lovers shirt from No Star.
That’s right, ladies. I’m a lover and a bowler. I’m a ten-pin two-stepper, and I don’t care who knows it. And for my bold brothers and sisters who aren’t afraid to let their shammy flag fly, wear your colors with pride. We’re bowlers. And we get it.
Oh, and for the true-blues, you’re welcome.
$24 | URL | Paypal, Credit | M: S – L